Chicago Winter is a Slow Beast

So tomorrow is going to be a high of -1. This is the forecast, cut and paste from weather.com.

"Bitterly cold. Mainly sunny. Dangerous wind chills may approach -30F. High -1F. Winds WNW at 15 to 25 mph."

At least it will be mainly sunny, as in there will be mainly deceptive sunlight filtering in through the windows. But to test said sunshine would be a bitch indeed.

Winters in Chicago, or in the midwest in general, are very slow. When you're outside for less than 10 minutes a day, and your vitamin D levels drop, your mood swings. Every day is a lifetime. At least this is how I've been feeling. Kind of blah. I find that my anxiety levels are higher in the winter, and my running commentary of worry is like mental diarrhea. Lately my mind has been on June, not only because it will bring sunshine, but also because I will be leaving my teaching position at St. Matthias. I'm going to be looking for more opportunities as a teaching-artist with theatre companies that do outreach and engagement, and to up my salary, especially after the faculty meeting in which we were informed that the Archdiocese of Chicago is freezing our salaries next year. So, on to bigger and better opportunities. Meanwhile I'm praying that a commercial or industrial will come my way.

Anyway, I worry, because transitions bring worry. But my acupuncturist, Elaine, calmed my fretting spirit. She said, "Let's make an agreement, that when you have that conversation with yourself about your career, really have that conversation. But then be done with it for the day. You know, really think about it. Be pro-active when you're thinking about it. Set aside an hour a day and spend time on it. But then be done. Cause you're not enjoying what's out there in the world."

So today I practiced compartmentalizing. At work I tried to focus on enjoying my co-workers, and being thankful for the time I have with the kids. I really love them, and they're growing so fast. And then later in the evening, I set aside an hour to pull out my resume and update it. And now I'm going to be done. And I'll be done until I edit again tomorrow, and done until I drop it in the mail. So on so forth. I can be fairly obsessive, so I'm hoping this change in thinking will help.

Anyhow. Tomorrow will come with its icy winds and red faces. Oh, and digging out my car. Thanks for the new winter gear, Mom.